From college presidents and deans to student residence hall staff, many college personnel are parents themselves. And, even those who are not are well attuned to the challenges of being a parent and how parents strive to give their children every possible opportunity.
But, spend just ten minutes with most college administrators and you'll learn how frustrating it is for them to deal with the people educators have come to call "helicopter parents".
What is a so-called helicopter parent? Just remember that a helicopter can hover almost endlessly, and you have your answer. "Although college is the time when most parents, like it or not, 'let go' of their children", says a dean at a southern university, "helicopter parents slow their kids' growth by being unable or unwilling to do so, so everybody loses".
Want to know if you are a helicopter parent? If you answer "yes" to one of the following questions, it is highly probable. Two "yes" answers and there is no question. Three such answers mean you really need to lighten up quickly.
1. Did your child have less to say to students and staff during his/her campus visits than you did?
2. During college visits, did you respond to questions addressed to your son/daughter or add to his/her answers?
3. Did you complete or help your child complete his/her applications for college admission?
4. Did you help write the admissions essay?
5. If your child tells you that his/her roommate is very difficult to live with, would you get involved?
6. If you are convinced that your child is being treated unfairly by an instructor, would you become involved?
7. During your child's college search, did you eliminate from consideration, other than for economic reasons, colleges and universities more than a short drive from your hometown?
What have you learned about yourself? Do you think you need to make some changes so that your child will learn to be more self-reliant? There are almost never easy answers to parenting questions once a child has reached his/her late teens, but if we ask ourselves the right questions, and analyze our answers, we'll have a much better chance of doing what is best for our children. Good luck.
About the Author:
Dr. Casper Poodel is very interested in online education of all kinds. His websites are on subjects including online schools, how to choose an online college and how to earn an accredited online degree.
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